Featuring our latest bonkers time travelling pirate adventure
The Extraordinary Voyages of Cap'n Basil Blackheart and his Motley Crew
The Crimson Revenge
The Extraordinary Voyages of Cap'n Basil Blackheart and his Motley Crew
The Crimson Revenge
Arrrrrr and greetings wunderpurr pals
We're finally back with our pirating adventure of epically epic proportions, we're furry sorry fur leaving mew all on tender hooks, seat edges, table tops and the like, neffurtheless your agonizing wait is now over and the story continues!
So welcome to the 9th and penultimate episode of our fabulous new adventure and just in case mew missed anything or furgot what happened, here's the links fur last 8 astonishingly spectacular episodes:
A quick recap from the last episode:
Smoke billowed up towards the sky and flames engulfed the ship.
Effurypurdy stopped firing and it seemed eerily quiet as we watched the pirate ship sink into the azure sea.
"Wow!" I said, when the crew assembled on the deck. "That was purretty intense!"
Smooch was glowing with pride. "I did it Basil! I did it Basil!" he beamed. "I blew those flaming balls into hell!"
"Mew did a great job Private!" I said. "Truly stellar, all of mew were pawesome!"
Humphrey took off his ear muffs and gave me a quizzical look. "So how come we had to fend off the Kraken with hot sauce, when if mew'd told us about the ship we could have just bombed that mother freaker into the netherworld?"
I knew that this was coming. "Humphrey, mew, Amber and Posie defeated the most feared sea monster of all time with nothing more than your sheer ingenuity and your lethal hot sauce," I answered. "Doesn't that make mew feel good, like really really good?" I paused. "Mew didn't need any fancy weapons, no modern tech and mew blew that mother freaker into oblivion and toasted its tentacled ass, mew are one serious, hardcore panfur!"
Humphrey thought about this fur a moment, his taught expression cracked into a broad smile and he cried out. "BOOYAH!"
"Besides, mew can't have a secret weapon if it's not a secret, can mew?"
The crew laughed.
"Shame about the pirates," Posie said. "NOT!"
I gave her a look. "Posie, there could be survivors and I think we should go see."
Amber tapped me on the shoulder and pointed towards the water.
"Ahhhhhh.... no survivors then.... too bad I always fancied making somepurddy walk the plank," I said taking in the multitude of sharks that had clustered offur the site of the sunken ship. "Sushi anyone? Then we'll have a big clean up and head back to shore in the morning."
* * *
Horice had seen the entire skirmish and stood thoughtfully pondering the possibilities.
"This changes everything," he murmured and wandered into the jungle.
* * *
The Crimson Revenge sailed closer to the shore, away from the wreckage of the newly sunk Filthy Pearl.
The sharks had done a damn fine clean up of the Filthy Pearl's crew and had subsequently swum off to find another meal.
"It's a shame there were no survivors," I muttered irately. "They really could have helped me with the treasure map."
"Treasure map!" Smoochie and Parsley squealed with delight.
'Oh bugger!' I thought. Clearing my throat, I said. "Yes, we have treasure map, howeffur I'm not sure what kind of treasure it is or even if we're in the correct local to retrieve it."
The crew scrambled to view the crinkled, antique map as I unrolled it on my desk.
"There's a treasure chest!" Posie said pointing at the centre of the aged document.
"Gold!" Smoochie squealed. "We're going to to be rich!"
I smiled inwardly as the crew talked animatedly amongst themselves about gold, silver and jewels.
"I'm getting my own tank!" Posie declared.
"I'm going to build a mega tree-house lookout and get it weaponed up to the teeth," Smoochie said gleefully.
"Well I'm going to get my own purrsonal butler," Humphrey smirked.
"Mew are all so pathetic!" Amber chided. "I'm going to get my own castle, with a moat that has crocodiles in it!"
I stood listening to their banter and finally said loudly, "Stop right there effurypurrdy!"
Silence filled the room and I continued. "If we find any treasure we are going to use it fur good causes, savvy?" I gave them by furry bestest 'don't mess with me stare'. "We are rich beyond imagination in our lives, we have a home, we're loved and we have food in our dishes, what more do we need?"
Smooch grumbled. "Another 50 cal would be nice!"
I laughed. "Smooch I have a spare 50 cal in the bunker back in Sleepy Hollow, if mew really need one mew can have it, ok?"
He grinned at me and nudged Parsley. "I'm getting my furry own 50 cal, how cool is that!"
"Can we share?" Parsley asked tentatively.
"Of course," Smooch answered.
"OK crew, we have work to do, Snowie mew scan and input the map into the computer and then we'll send a drone out offur the island to map it and compare the two. The rest of us need to continue with the clean up, so let's get to it!"
* * *
Meanwhile Horice had returned to the temple with much haste.
Amsted was meditating as Horice reached the altar deep within the Temple of the Secret Pagoda.
"Amsted," he said quietly.
The orangutan's eyes popped open. "Horice," he answered calmly. "Cap'n Basil and his crew 'av thee map."
"They be also 'aving weapons aboard their vessel of thee like I 'av never seen," Horice imparted.
Amsted thought fur a moment. "We can't be 'aving the treasure discovered, it can never leave the island, you know the cost if it does."
Horice nodded solemnly. "Aye that I do."
"Cap'n Basil will have to be stopped if he gets too close."
Horice sighed deeply. "This saddens me acutely as I thought we'd found your successor to take care of the island, even the Creator ordained it, so what went wrong?"
Amsted shook his head. "I know not, but ye have to stop them finding thee treasure otherwise thee whole world will cease to exist."
Horice nodded and promptly left the temple.
* * *
The drone flew noisily offur the island, going back and forth all day.
I went to find Snowie late in the afternoon. "How are we doing?"
"Nearly there a few more passes and we should be good to go," Snowie replied.
Returning to the deck, The Crimson Revenge looked nearly as good as new [well nearly, as best it could do after a close encounter with a 40 ton Kraken wrapped around it]. We had repaired the masts, new sails were hung and all the debris had been cleared away. To be honest it's really quite amazing what 6 cats can do if they put their minds to it.
"Good job crew!" I said as they came and sat on the deck in front of me. "Snowie say's a few more passes and then we'll collate the data fur a comparison with the map, but while we wait I think we've earned a tea break."
* * *
Horice was deep in the jungle heading back to the beach as the light was beginning to fade when he heard the strange buzzing sound, he raced to a clearing and looked up.
"That be the biggest mosquito me eyes 'av ever witnessed!" he exclaimed as the noisy thing buzzed overhead at speed. "And it be 'aving some serious speed about it."
A short while later it flew back again. Horice watched the giant mozzie for some time before he realised it wasn't what he thought it was. He picked up a coconut with his trunk and hurled it towards the mechanical flying demon with all his might. Two seconds later they collided and the mechanical demon fell to the ground with a clatter.
He moved in for a closer inspection, nudging the flailing metal arms with his trunk, the hydraulic joints whirred and vibrated. They jerked one final time, then closed around it's body like a massive dead spider and the strange eye-like device mounted at the front blinked several times with an audible clicking sound. He suddenly backed away when it started to buzz with a rather high pitch whine and subsequently burst into flames.
"Well that be the end of that!" he said stomping on the jungle floor to put the flames out and he continued on his way.
* * *
"Basil, Basil, Basil!" Snowie called from the control room.
I slid down the fireman's pole and landed with a soft thwump.
"Are we ready Snowie?" I asked thinking the drone had completed mapping the island.
"Er no," she replied as rest of the crew slid down the pole and joined us. "We've had a little hiccup."
I raised an eyebrow. "Little hiccup, how so, the drone was programmed to fly 30 feet above the ground and mew can see exactly what it was seeing."
"Yes," she answered and pushed a button on the console panel. "I think mew'd better watch this."
We stood and watched the footage.
"Hmmmmmm.... that was rather unexpected," I said watching the demise of the drone by Horice's trunk and a rather deadly coconut.
"Wow!" said Smooch. "That was a terrifically pawesome throw, and such an accurate aim!"
"Indeed," I concurred.
"Why would Horice wipe out our drone?" Humphrey asked.
I shrugged. "I don't know I'm sure, but mew can bet your stash of catnip that there's more going off on that weirdo island than we could effur know!"
"Fur sure," Amber agreed.
"But what do mew think is going off?" Posie asked.
"Posie honestly I have no clue, but somethings a-paw, that's fur sure," I replied.
"But mew still didn't tell us about your orball experience," Parsley said.
I pondered this fur a moment. "That was something quite extraordinary, but now is not the time, I promise I will tell mew all but not today if that's ok with mew?"
The crew nodded and I took the oppurtunity to return the conversation to the issue at paw.
"Snowie use the footage we have and begin the mapping overlay process and let's just see what we've got," I asked.
Snowie began to tap on the console. The mapping programme initiated and we all stood there with baited breath as we watched the screen as the two images were compared. A few minutes later the programme finished it's comparison and we could see without a shadow of a doubt that the map and the island were the same place, even though a third of the island was missing from our footage, it was obvious we were in the right place.
"Well that's the good news, we're in the right place," I said. "The bad news is, we don't know how much the final third of the island has changed and that's the bit we need, and more bad news is, we don't have another drone to complete the mapping, so basically we're as blind as a newborn kitten."
"There must be a way to get the final footage," Posie said.
"Even if we had another drone, who's to say Horice wouldn't destroy that one too?" I said.
"Furry true," Humphrey agreed. "There must be something they they don't want us to find, that much is obvious."
I nodded. "But why is it so important that we don't find it? That's the question we need to be asking."
We sat in silence and pondered the possibilities.
* * *
Horice emerged on the beach and watched The Crimson Revenge from the shore. He could see no activity aboard and took the opportunity to call on some fishy friends. The mystical orb shot out from the tree line and hovered in-front of him.
A few minutes later his call was answered.
"I be needing ye to go and spy on Cap'n Basil," Horice said to the dolphin. "I'll be awaiting on ye return post haste."
The dolphin dove back into the water and Horice watched as his friend closed in on The Crimson Revenge.
"I 'av to stop Cap'n Basil finding thee secret treasure," he muttered anxiously. "Otherwise Amsted will be 'aving an execution again... I like Cap'n Basil too much to be letting this fate befall him and his crew..."
* * *
I paced the deck as the sun began to set offur the horizon. Back on the beach the palms swayed in the cool breeze and I took a long, slow breath, the salty ocean air invigorating my senses.
Lost in thought as to why Horice took out our drone I suddenly heard a splash next to the ship and raced to the side and peered towards the water. The light was fading fast and all I saw was a lone fin sink beneath the inky surface.
"So many questions and not enough answers!" I mumbled worriedly. Something didn't sit right deep within my gut and I just couldn't put my paw on it. [I did wunder if it was the dodgy Kraken Sushi we ate earlier causing the odd sensation!]
I was just about to go back to the control room when Smooch called out from the crows nest.
"Basil! Basil! Basil!" he cried loudly.
"What's your boggle Smooch?" I answered.
"Basil something's wrong on the island!"
"How do mew mean wrong?" I asked.
"There's a really weird green light, quick look!"
I spun around and was amazed at the light show that seemed to encircle the entire island in a rather disconcerting green glow.
"What madness is this?" I murmured as an odd sensation crawled all offur my skin and my fur stood on end and quivered.
As each week passes there are still so many questions, such as:
Fur flips sake, mew guy's really attract some weirdo's into your life, how do mew do it?
What the issue with the treasure?
If mew took it, would it really be the end of the world as we know it?
Oh hang on mew guy's don't know that bit yet, do mew? MOL
Is Horice going to pay mew back fur destroying your drone?
BTW that was one seriously cool drone, where'd mew get it from?
Is Amsted really that much of a nutter that he'd execute mew fur trying to take the treasure?
So Horice is really on your side, well maybe, he's just a little conflicted right?
But seriously he's got your backs, right?
And, how are mew going to get home?
Really, surely the P.A. is rather demented by your absence after all this time, how do mew think she's doing, and we heard that Speedy the House Bunny has been back to Sleepy Hollow looking fur mew guys... jeez... guys we think it's time mew came back to the future!
* * *
Next week is the grand finale, and will probably be a furry long post so batten down the hatches, get the nip rum in, the nip cookies and recline in your hammocks until then... no edge's of seats, or tables fur that matter - get a bit of comfort happening before the final roller coaster episode as mew know it's going be wet, wild, and probably completely off the planet as that's how we roll.
Tune in to see if we actually do make it back to the future....
Join us tomorrow for our regular Wordless on Wednesday post as mew know how much we love your visits, nip tea and light refreshments are prepared fresh effury day fur elevenses should mew require anything while mew're here, mew only have to ask.
Hearty purrs and salty sea-spray head rubs
Cap'n Basil & the Crew of The Crimson Revenge XOX