Tuesday, 5 April 2016

Tuesday Tails ~ Pirate Q&A ~The Secrets of The Voyages of Captain Basil Revealed ~ Part V

Welcome to 


 Pirate Q&A 

The Secrets of The Voyages of Captain Basil Revealed

So me seafaring pirating fiends, are ye ready to discover all the secrets, and get thee answers to thee questions that have been keeping ye awake night aftur night??


If ye missed the previous Q&A just be clicking the links below:

Now that we be 'aving that out of thee way, let's be getting on with divulging the answers from  Part V 

Here's the questions:

Does Humphrey actually frequent such places with rather inadequate hygiene practices?

Appurrently not, that was just Amber and Posie saying Humphrey had crabs, and lobsters fur that matter because they were both annoyed at his inability to extract himself from his hammock and help clean up The Crimson Revenge.

I later found out that his purrchant fur catnip and nip rum, oh and not furgetting his hangoffur was the reason fur this. Humphrey did say he was having 'hair of the cat'  to get him up and at 'em, and that he had effury intention of helping... at some point... later in the day... much much later... aftur a really good catnap.  

What on earth is that tentacled thing rising out of the deep?

That was as mew all know by now a Kraken, aka Krakai-gar-ganutaun-squidus-leviathan, which as I mentioned in Part IV strangely became extinct in 1683. 

The Kraken's were the most feared creature of the deep back in the day, and many a ship and crew fell victim to their cunning and slippery [pardon the pun] ambush's.

The furry few survivors of such attacks raised the alarm and the Krakens were hunted mercilessly throughout the 1600's until they finally became extinct as I mentioned earlier.  As there were neffur any more sightings reported aftur that year, unless and I hope I'm wrong, the Krakens wised up and made sure there were no survivors, as dead men tell no tales!  

Who knows, purrhaps Kraken's still lurk in the darkly, deep depths as we don't know fur sure exactly what lives in those remote briny places, as even today the bottom of the oceans are still mainly unmapped, in fact the peeps know more about the moon and other planets than they do about the depths of our oceans.  

Scary thought huh?  There could be all manner of things living down there that we really wouldn't want to meet, like effur!

Purrhaps aliens have underwater bases... ok, I'll stop there... MOL MOL

How will Posie, Humphrey and Amber get away from it?

They can thank their lucky stars fur a rather potent batch of Hot Sauce otherwise affectionately known as 'liquid dynamite' - this is because if mew add a fuses and light them, let's just say the explosion is quite spectacular.  

To be honest I was furry impressed that Humphrey came up with such a Machiavellian plan at such short notice.... most impressed!  [So he wasn't that hung-offur]

Appurently the batch he'd made fur Speedy's Pirate Pawty had been contaminated by a little 'fall out' from a bazooka party which Smooch and Parsley were having in the bunker [heathen children - note to self change code on armoury door!]  it wasn't until Humphrey was at the pawty and they dowsed the meaty offurings on the BBQ with it that he discovered that it was highly and I mean highly volatile. 

The combination of flames and hot sauce caused the BBQ to explode and as fur the meaty delights, well lets just say they were beyond toasted and crispy creamed.  The good news was that we all still had our eyebrows, the bad news was Speedy's garden was a little scorched - many apologies to Speedy and his mum, we did offur to send new turf and a couple of shubbery shrubs to replace the burnt bushes. 

What will become of The Crimson Revenge if they abandon ship?

They'd neffur abandon the ship, well maybe but only f it was sinking and they had absolutely no other choice.

OMC that sounds like some really big secret, are mew really ready fur that kind of commitment?

Mew remember the slightly unhinged Amsted and the glowing orb in the Temple of the Secret Pagoda, and that he wanted me to touch said glowy pulsey orb, I must admit that I was rather purrturbed by this as mew neffur know what magical items may do, or where they may send mew.   This added to my anxiety and I was rather worried about leaving my crew with him as who knew at that point what was going to happen.

But he offured me enlightenment, and really who can say no to that, so I took a chance and went fur it.   I know mew are despurrate to learn the answers after my meeting with the big dude himself but that comes in the next two revelations epsiodes. [Well I can't reveal effurything at once! MOL]

And what's that name of that fancy resort mew're staying at?

It was called Temple of the Secret Pagoda, but as mew now know it was a resort per se but a rather bizarre place that was filled with magical and mayhem.   Definitely not a place I would recommend on TripAdvisor or the like. 

Does it have a four or five star rating?

I purrsonally would give it minus zero stars as I mentioned in Revelations I, due to the fact that;

a: The journey there was a nightmare
b: Even though the beach's were furry sandy and welcoming, the pygmy cannibal Tor-Tye weren't
c: Swimming with sharks has neffur been on my bucket list
d:  Kraken Surprise speaks fur itself - not on my bucket list either
e: Meeting new and furry unhinged creatures and immersing yourself in their culture and traditions - a definite no no
f:  Being ambushed my the most fearsome pirate of that era - another not on my to do list
g: Living on a knifes edge fur purretty much most of time we were there - not relaxing in the slightest
h: Barely escaping several supurr close shaves - not the best way to unwind and chill
i: Barely escaping the island

My advice is have a Staycation, that's our plan fur this summer! MOL 

[But then again mew that even in Sleepy Hollow anything can happen at anytime....]

And what's the room service like? 

In a wurd - Dreadful

So until next weeks Pirate Q&A, shiver me timbers, get thee a bottle o'nip rum and a hammock, and we'll be seeing mew on the morrow!

   Aharrrrrrrrrrrrrr me hearties and sail the highs sea's safely, until next time

Hearty purrs and salty sea-spray head rubs

Cap'n Basil & the Crew of The Crimson Revenge XOX


  1. humphrey....dood.....we new all a long; az ya waz chillaxin in yur hammick, ya waz dee vizin wayz oh puttin de hot sauce two grate use for de grandest eggz plosion oh 2015 ....just like we noe ewe haza paln in de werkz that will en sure de crimson never never ever ever...sinkz !! ♥♥♥

    1. high paws dood.... & yea...furst spellin izzue oh '16...thatz spozed ta bee PLAN.....knot paln ~~~~~ ♥

    2. Guys mew know that's exactly what Humphrey was doing!! MOL

  2. Are you serious??? I have had sleepless nights ever since you met the big dude and I thought all was going to be revealed. Oh well, another week without sleep. At this rate I will be mistaken for a panda with these huge shadows under my eyes.

    1. Awwww Flynn, hopefully now you can rest easier! MOL

  3. Hmmm... When you're looking for four or five stars and the place has a zero star rating, I think you might need to keep looking, for sure. But I'll tell you what does get five stars. Yup, five stars out of five. YOU ADVENTURE! It gets the highest rating possible from me.


    1. Awwwww thanks Seville, that means so much to us!!! XOX


*Waves Paw* we love comments and do purr extra loud when mew leave one, and we do try to reply to effurypurrdy and visit mew too! ❤️❤️❤️

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